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A Hero
A large crowd had formed at the Pearly Gates, when Saint Peter came out with an announcement. "Because Heaven has become overcrowded, we can only let heroes in today. Is anyone here a hero?"
One small man raised his hand. "I am," he said.
"What did you do that was heroic?" asked Saint Peter skeptically.
"I witnessed a motorcycle gang about to attack a woman. I stopped my car, grabbed a crowbar, and got between the gang and the frightened lady. I looked them dead in the eyes and told them if they were going to hurt her, they had to go through me first."
"Wow," said St. Peter. "When did this happen?"
"About thirty seconds ago," said the man.
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