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Rabbits Ph.D. Thesis
Rabbit's Ph.D. Thesis: A Parable for Graduate Students Scene: It's a fine sunny day in the forest, and a rabbit is sitting outside his burrow, tippy-tapping on his typewriter. Along comes a fox, out for a walk. Fox: "What are you working on?" Rabbit: "My thesis." Fox: "Hmmm. What's it about?" Rabbit: "Oh, I'm writing about how rabbits eat foxes." (incredulous pause) Fox: "That's ridiculous! Any fool knows that rabbits don't eat foxes." Rabbit: "Sure they do, and I can prove it. Come with me." They both disappear into the rabbit's burrow. After a few minutes, the rabbit returns, alone, to his typewriter and resumes typing. Soon, a wolf comes along and stops to watch the hardworking rabbit. Wolf: "What's that you're writing?" Rabbit: "I'm doing a thesis on how rabbits eat wolves." (loud guffaws) Wolf: "You don't expect to get such rubbish published, do you?" Rabbit: "No problem. Do you want to see why?" The rabbit and the wolf go into the burrow, and again the rabbit returns by himself, after a few minutes, and goes back to typing. Scene: Inside the rabbit's burrow. In one corner, there is a pile of fox bones. In another corner, a pile of wolf bones. On the other side of the room, a huge lion is belching and picking his teeth. (The End) Moral: It doesn't matter what you choose for a thesis subject. It doesn't matter what you use for data. What does matter is who you have for a thesis advisor.
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